who are you?
February 9, 2011 5 Comments
so, instead of working on my paper, i feel the urge to vent a bit in the blog space. as you might have read, the old place was pretty quick and kind to separate me from their privileged system. first i should clarify it’s not a university that cut me. anyhow, they are known to be HIGHLY inefficient at the tax payers’ expense. As an example, this was a frustrating conversation i had with their tech support 3 days before the cut-off was official:
-hi, i’d like to forward my email to my new school address
–what computer are you using? mac or pc?
-pc, linux
–what do you use to read email?
-thunderbird
–can’t you just forward your own mail?
-no, i was told by you guys i can’t do it unless i’m using internet explorer and outlook
–technically we don’t support this kind of request
-oh, i know you do, you’ve done it for me once before
–oh? ok, let me see if i can find someone to help you…. ok, i’m filling out a request for you, “user request mail moved to outlook”
-NO! i’d like to have my email forwarded to my new address!
-(angry) are you using outlook??
–This has nothing to do with outlook or thunderbird, it’s mail forwarding!
-(after some time) ok, now request says “user would like mail forwarding on thunderbird”
–NO! please enter in request: “user wants mail forwarding from aaa@bbb to xxx@yyy!!
-ok, here’s your ticket number. BYE!
Then nothing happened until 2 days after i got cut off that they called: “we just call to inform you we don’t forward mail that had been cut off already.” thanks. i already know that. that’s why i called you before my account got disconnected!
Anyhow, so 2 days before i left, after that incredibly annoying separating email arrived in the mailbox, i ran up and down and around trying to sort out what was needed to reverse the damn process. from high to low ranking people, everyone reassured me: oh, we’ve filled out forms X, Y, Z, AA, BB, etc. Just check in with us next week, we believe everything will be fine. you’re a privileged US citizen after all.
Still totally unable to access anything, i called in today. person X (really nice person in the department): “ah, the process went though fine, follow steps (1)-(5), you should be able to log in as usual. if you have difficulty, just call alpha-beta for help.” Step (1): nope. calling alpha-beta
-how can I help you?
–hi, i have recently transitioned from being on-location to remote-access. but my account seems not enabled. can you re-enable it?
-sure. what’s your id number? (gave).
hmm, what’s your name? (gave).
hmm, what’s your username? (gave)
and you said you were here just 9 days ago? hmm… can i put you on hold…
(several minutes later) hmm, i can’t find you anywhere
–WHAT?
-sorry, we don’t know why. it shouldn’t have happened. which group were you in? what’s the head guy?
–A
-ok, you need to call A to have them call B to reactivate your account.
calling A
-oh, hi, how has your move been?
–ah thanks, it’s going ok. except (some explanation)…, they told me to tell you to call B
-i think you need to talk first to X
–yes, it was X who told me to call alpha-beta who told me to call you, and now back to X?
-ok, let me check.. will let you know…
20 email exchanges later:
Y: hi, i’ve re-started the entire process to get you back. here are forms C, D, E, F to complete.
X: (i leave you to read the modified email below, see if you understand)
the recently implemented process for eta-chi-squared is not in synch with the gamma-sigma-omega system. Unfortunately we
started the damn separation process without your approval, thenchanged your separation date.somehow it’s assumedyour id should be retained for future visits and that yourfranticre-access request should sail through. It was thought that the gamma-sigma-omega system request aborted the separation process, but it did not, and your release into space by the mother ship was achievedon02-Feb-2011. It is not clear why we cant seem to get you back with the approval and completion of the gamma-sigma-omega request. So in the interest of time, the wholesearchrequest process will now restartin hope to find you.
For such a highly incompetent system, I have to say i’m just absolutely in awe how efficient they are at wiping out people. anyhow, sit tight, i might be able to reaccess my computer by next year.
About thả diều
Ha! I’ve got a solution….Send them your resume, and get them to re-hire you remotely, give you the same email account you had before, and then quit – see if it works the second time ’round… >:)
hey Kristy! isn’t it a wonderful feeling knowing how your tax money is so wisely spent? after these episodes, not sure if i ever motivated to even come near them… except they have my data!! grrrr . i was told in the corporate world, there are situations where you’re given only 1 hr notice to leave and not allowed to take anything with you. this comes pretty close.
this is insane.
On the bright side, you could always turn these experiences into a Kafka-esque short story or a script for Marx Brothers movie…
I hope they will manage to re-establish everything before 2012!
if i know how to write fiction Anik, this would have been a good story already :-). i’m still quite amazed how they treated people there. and i was a privileged US citizen. I’ve heard the situation is much much worse when you’re branded as a “foreign national”. many of my colleagues have been dealing with this, so now when i complain to them, they just tell me: welcome to our world!
you know, any __________ with a hammer can destroy things, of course they can completely wipe you out. In fact, they didn’t mean to wipe you out, they were just doing their job.